â€œWhy dear God did you create me if you had no love for me. Why did you leave me into this world where nobody cares about me or loves me? I might as well be dead and nobody would notice. Not even you.
For what fault of mine did you make me like this, what sin have I committed to be condemned to exist like this, useless, unloved and unwanted.
When everyone my age went to school, I was bound and locked up. Why? Because I was different, because I was unique? Oh no, not unique I was weird, the crack head, the one who went cuckoo.
When others my age got sweets and clothes for festivals, what did I get? Leftovers from my siblingsâ€™ plates? Is it too much to ask to be treated like a human?
If they did not want me, why did they give birth to me? If they think Iâ€™m the devilâ€™s child why do they still keep me locked up, why canâ€™t they kill me or sacrifice and give my blood to the deity or whatever it is that they do with children like me.
If this was the life you planned for me, why did you not give me the strength to bear it all and not crumble under the pain. The physical pain itself is too much to bear, why you gave me this pain of being not accepted into my own family too!!!
Today Iâ€™m ready. Ready to leave this hateful world forever. I have no drop of joy left in me, no iota of desire to live. Iâ€™ve seen enough and been tormented enough to take another breath and fuel this wretched existence. I have had enough of being a burden to the very family Iâ€™m supposed to look after, im fed up of making my family shed tears and lament over the birth of someone like me. Iâ€™ve had enough of it all. Now I understand that the world is no place for people like me, who are born only to repent for some sins of past lives and to torment themselves and seek redemption. But Iâ€™ve had enough, I donâ€™t seek redemption. All I ever asked for is acceptance, a bit of love and someone to share my pain with.
But yes, there is one wish. Donâ€™t let anyone else go through what Iâ€™ve been through. Never create another child like me. Please.”Â
USCâ€™s MSW Programs Blog Day.
This is written for WriteTribe, where we bloggers have come together to blog for a cause that is close to many of our hearts.Â
The international theme for World Suicide Prevention Day 2013 is Stigma: a major barrier to suicide prevention.
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